Today I have been feeling very disconnected. I am not entirely sure why and I have no idea what to do about it. I have prayed and asked Him to guide me. I feel lost and without a home or a place, not in the literal sense but in regards to people. I feel like I need a place to land, to be heard, to be understood, to be encouraged, to be ministered to and to minister to others.
As I reflect on what has been happening in my life lately, it’s really not all that surprising that I am having these feelings of disconnect from people.
Over a year a go, God had gave me a vision of having a Sunday night gathering here at our farm. Several people from the church were hungry for connection so we formed a group in the fall of 2016.
In December we made the excruciating decision to start visiting other churches. The kids and I were still attending our old church on Wednesday nights. They were doing youth and kids activities and I was in a ladies’ Bible study class.
It was one of the hardest things I have ever done but I needed to move on.
Then in April we felt it was time to say goodbye to the Sunday night group as well. We have since started up another group this summer which is in line with the original vision that God gave me.
We are now no longer going to Wednesday night services either for a variety of reasons and it is really starting to take a toll on me.
For the last 11 years I have been so actively involved in that church. The people there were truly my family and yet it is no longer home to me. I know that God has brought me to this place in my life and my ministry. He has given me the use of a church building in Creal Springs. This is my mission field and I know that He had to move me away from where I had been so comfortable in order to serve Him here.
The Lord has been doing so much here with the church building and the local ministry that He has called me to but right now it feels very lonely.
Kelli told me today that God clearly told her that He is bringing me to my People and that I am right where I am supposed to be. I believe that with all my heart and I certainly needed to hear those words.
My wise friend Carrie also shared with me today that perhaps I am walking this road right now so that I know what it feels like to be lost and wondering. I believe she may be right.
If you are feeling disconnected, lost or lonely please feel free to reach out. We understand what it is like to do what God wants and still feel disconnected. Any one of us would be honored to pray with you and share a word of encouragement.